Friends

So I gotta give a shout out to a few people who in the last week or so jump out to me as being huge prayer support and mommy support. I've got a few on the brain right now but I'll mention one - drum roll please... Nichole! Oh how I love her. She bounced into my life a few months ago, well almost a year I guess and we didn't "hit it off" cause we didn't really spend a lot of time together for a while but since we have a small church home group in our home we have become closer, and my oh my am I better for it. I've had her weigh in on a few things and isn't' it funny how usually we know the answer to the problem but it takes someone else saying it for us to register it like it was a good idea? Funny, I'm so that way, I'd like to think I am on my game all the time but let's face it that's just not me especially lately. I'm strugglin and I mean in a gut wrenching kinda way about having to work full time outside the house. My goal was to only be gone til our guy gets home but as it looks now serious medication will need to get me through. So I feel in my gut I gotta quit right, but uh that doesn't exactly make sense right now? In the middle of a costly adoption, I got this job so fast when I thought I wasn't going to be working for a while so that was a blessing for sure, but I completely and totally lost the reality of what being gone all the time is like and how stinkin hard it is. I've fought like mad comin up with odds and end jobs to be at home and now I'm gone 36+ hours a week sometimes 48 depending on overtime situation, and it's a crappy job and I do mean that literally, I clean crap. Gross eh? Yup, that's the blunt way to put it and not that the job isn't necessary - somebody's got to do it, but just not this somebody. So I have a had a few talks with friends this week and the same message is - find peace and be home with your kids. Which I know in my heart right but explain that to the hubby - hey I'm gonna cut the 1,000 + a month cool? Yeah and I don't know how to help us raise money for the adoption but it's all good right? Anyway, so back to my shout out - I love Nichole, I need her to say what she said and it wasn't revolutionary but it was needed and publicly to all 5 of you who read this blog I just want to say - I love ya Nichole, you are one amazing mommy and you hold a special place in my heart. :).
So yup that's it for now. So I am going to try a little mini business thing if it pans out I'll share it but it's in dream phase almost reality phase so we'll see. Jas is all for it which is great, I know he wants me here with the kids he did tell me the other day " I just want you to pick what you want to do and do it, I don't care what it is, just stop jumping around jobs" So I know he's game but I gotta trust that my Jesus cares that I want to be with my kids and He will show me how to do it and how to tackle our adoption moola situation. So anyone who wants to join me in prayin BIG things for this family of 5 getting their boy home to make 6, let's see what we've got in store.
Kala