A Burden for the Babies

Ok all, for those of you who may not know, Ethiopia is currently not importing infant formula into their country. They do not have the means to produce this product and since they are in economic distress (we Americans don't know the meaning of the word I'm sure!) they are unable to financially bring imported products like infant formula into the country. So what does this mean? Folks, this means we step up and be the people God is calling us to be. We dig deep, find the resource, and get it into the mouths - literally - of these innocent children that wouldn't otherwise have the chance at a meal. My heart is literally ACHING for these infants with no mommies or daddies to snuggle them into their beds, kiss their foreheads and lay them down for a good night's rest. Some of these precious children are lined in rooms with workers diligently trying to care for large numbers of babies that are waiting for their forever families to come. Some of them may not have a chance to meet their new parents if proper nutrition is not available. I can hardly wrap my mind around it. I look at my sweet Mikey - a busy 20 month old ray of sunshine, what if he was sitting in a crib with no hope of physical touch other than a diaper change and a propped bottle? I started bawling last night at the thought. It's not fair, it's not right, and I can't imagine a world where some walk by or turn the backs, out of convenience and not stop along life's path and invest in little ones they will never hold, embrace, or speak to. So I go to bed tonight committing to prayer these treasures that God so deeply loves.

Lord, may we who have the resource reach out to those who we will never know, and while we work, keep their bellies full enough, keep their spirits high, keep the smiles coming. Lord, I ask for guidance, lead me into a place where my heart breaks like Yours breaks when You see any of Your children suffer unjustly. May we be a light to those who can't seem to see it right now. I love you Jesus, more and more each day, I want to live a life worthy of your smile and approval. Let me shine for Your glory. (And help me be nice about it when people say they can't help, I'm struggling to see how they could turn their backs.) Give me patience, kindness, warmth and a heart that beats for orphans.

Amen.

Milk and Cheese

WARNING!!! The following is NOT a brag session merely THANKING GOD for HIS unfailing patience with me!! Ok so YEARS ago we lived in Spokane (some of the best years of my life to date) and we were literally living my the grace of God financially. The church we were at didn't pay great (surprise surprise, a ministry job that you don't get rich in) and I had snagged a pretty awesome babysitting gig in my own home with one family that happened to pay AWESOME. Anywho, so back in these days we had enormous debt and I have blogged previously about my desire to be debt free and save money. That's me in a nut shell, no financial woes, wouldn't that be great? So we had school payment, credit cards, car payments, life payments you know the drill. And my hubby made around $2000 a month roughly and God landed me this amazing job where I made around $900 a month. Anyway, broke we were, every time I turned around we had another bill to pay and couldn't seem to get ahead. We'd get a tax return, pay off one bill, not be good and rack up even more debt. It was a vicious cycle. And I have also mentioned in previous blogs, I'm a dreamer right? Ok, so one of my dreams in life is to have money available to give to other people, whether I know them or not, like a lady who's card is declined in the store, cover it for her. Get someone groceries and never let them find out it was me. That kind of stuff. You get the idea. I wanted to be as generous as I could but financially we just couldn't do it. So we move to Yakima and the spending doesn't change and the finances stay tight. Until Jas and I get on the same page. So it's only been a year or so, maybe not even that long that we've been very careful about money. No car payments, cheap food, careful spending etc. And we might have a new adventure to which I can't give details on yet coming quite soon. Anyway, so we've tried to be faithful stewards of the money God is giving us each month. Ok, LONG intro I know.... so Monday morning I woke up and thought of a friend and I felt God saying, take her milk. So Jas went to the store for us cause we needed milk and cheese and we got her and her fam some milk and cheese. So I called her up and made sure she was home and dropped it off to her. She blogged it was God's grace to her, but I am more confident it was God's grace for me. See I've been wanting to do this for a long time, and if I look back yeah sure there were moments we had dough but we were busy spending it on stupid crap not looking outward to find people who might need help. So I'm standing back today and this week and just thankful to God for patiently waiting for our lives to back up what's in our hearts so we can show Jesus to people we know and hopefully to people we may not know. I'm praying my heart is bent towards generosity and that God will give me the eyes to see the needs and the ears to hear him whispering "Go get them some milk and cheese!"

Blessings,
Kala

Could This Day Get Any Better????

Ok, so I'm stoked! Today in the mail after... count 'em people.... 6 WEEKS!!!!, we finally received our approved home study in the mail! Oh yeah baby. I'm so stinkin excited. My paperwork would already be at our agency except when we verified our documents and put them in order we realized we missed a few things. Oops. I would like to say this is an anomaly and that we are always prepared and ready for everything but I would be lying - we are throw it together kinda people. Need I say more? Anyway. Surprisingly enough I'm in a great mood after getting the mail considering Mikey has another HORRIBLE cold and didn't sleep for nothin last night. So I'm wiped out but amazingly optimistic with our new hurdle almost completed.
On another smokin note, K Mart is doubling coupons. Sing it with me, Hallelujah, Hallelujah!! I almost screamed when I saw the ads. And I've been a good little coupon momma and saved TONS of coupons for just about everything sooooo.... I'm headin to K Mart to save some dough on some much needed items and Christmas stocking stuffers and such. Woohoo. So I will post after I hit K Marche and brag about my sales! :). Hopefully the isles aren't bare yet.
On a Christmas note, we are fully decorated and loving our Christmas-y house. I love this time of year except for snow. Snow is only for looking at with me. We have a love/hate relationship, snow and I. Snow loves to look pretty and inviting and beckons all those feeling in a shopping mood (which is me on any given moment) to venture out into the weather and enjoy it's beauty. I, on the other hand, HATE snow. Every year it costs me money, usually cause I bounce of something in my car like oh I don't know, someone else's car for example. And that's just you know, uh, hypothetically speaking of course. On that hypothetical note, let's say I have totalled one car, messed up a parent's truck, bounced off a cement barrier. In this 'hypothetical' world there are too many accidents to name. Anywho... nice tangent huh? So it's Christmas time, and we celebrate 12 days of Christmas with our kids by doing a small present each day starting December 13th. Now since we have one more boy to get home we are downscaling like crazy in the spending department but are still managing to get some cute and fun things that will delight the kids. The girls look so forward to fun little things. This year we are adding in like a pack of Oreos which sounds silly to some I'm sure, but you obviously don't know my feeling of Oreos and how strongly I feel the need to educate my children on this particular matter. I LOVE Oreos, and only double stuff thank you very much.(Side note, when I was prego with Faithie, I would call Jason literally every other day for an Oreo run on his way home from work, they are miraculous, seriously.) There are few things I HAVE to buy name brands of and Oreo's are one of them. There's no skimpin, that and Kraft Mac and Cheese. Once you go Kraft, you'll never go back! Hehe. Seriously though, I'm not big on brand names unless they are ridiculously cheap and then I'll get them. But I've got standards. So, tonight I'm off to find some ridiculously cheap deals for stockings and gifts and household items, unfortunately our K Mart doesn't have numerous food items. Wish me luck!!

Blessings,
KalaKalaBoBala


*****Update: So, Kmarche...drum roll.... I spent 23.68 and saved a grand total of 16.25 in coupons, oh yeah, it was a great night. Plus my momma went with me and it's rare to spend time with just her, so bonus!!

I lost my mind!!

Ok not cause Jason's gone, although that hasn't helped. So I live in this little place called 'La La Land' where we can eat candy and our butts don't grow, where my children wake up saying, 'Mom what can I do for you today?', where mysteriously someone broke into my house, cleaned it, left mints on my pillow, stocked the fridge, and had homemade bread fresh out of the oven for me to indulge in. Ok so I want to live there, I don't actually, cause if I did you all wouldn't know about, I'd be hiddin that little treasure!! Anyway, I'm like the loftiest thinker, where even though I can be pessimistic, God gave me a wild, free imagination where I don't need details cause it will work out right? And I know my God is like huge, so that works out well. So I guess I never grew up cause that's the beauty and innocence of a child, anything and everything is possible because you haven't been tainted by negativity or the world or your friends or parents or the bullies at school. You can do and be whatever you want to be. That's where this little mind lives. So when I think about 'Gee what shall I do with my life?' I can't put my finger on it, I think teacher, tried that and NOPE, checked that off the list, I keep saying I'm going to nursing school but I don't know if that will ever happen. So anyway, I know I want to be with my kids, it feels right (and frustrating at times) but that's where I seem to click. I love kids. I love my kids, I love other people's kids. I'm a kid person. So the idea of adoption just clicks with me. I have a HUGE heart for kids, and whether I have more of my own or seek out the ones God lays on my heart, I'm open for the journey. Ok so back to loftiness for minute. When I felt God say "Adopt, you can do something for someone, go find your child' I was running for the nearest computer, praying to find the answers, and here we are today, waiting for our boy. But when God spoke, I acted. I didn't look at the price tag, which I know deters most people from adoption, I didn't flinch at any financial ramifications at all. I just went to work to find out how to come up with the money. It wasn't ever a deterrent. I believe God knows our financial situation, that whole heartedly we want to live debt free, make conscious choices to be money savvy and want to be freed up to live lives worthy of His approval. So I believe that He will help us get our boy home, and you know what it's ok if we still have a loan payment, which I have read on other blogs people who are against getting loans. Hey if you're one of them, that's great, I applaud you keeping it debt free but the timing of our adoption just so happened that we needed that money right then to get our boy and I do believe that it will be ok, maybe had we not gotten a loan it would've played out differently, I don't really care to debate, our family made a choice, it worked and we are happy all the more for having a face the to dream God gave us. Anyway, sorry for the tangent. I keep feeling like we need to be a catalyst. That our adoption isn't just about us and our son, that we have a chance to bring awareness, prayer, money, and dreams to other people whether they feel they can adopt and go for it, or they help someone else adopt. Whatever they feel God leading them to, may they be faithful and be a blessing. So we are lucky enough to have people in our lives that buy into adoption and are helping us find creative ways to raise the money. We did the yard sale, we have a family that sent out donation letters, and we have a family friend who is helping us put together a fundraiser/silent auction dinner. So here's where I start getting all La La Landish, I don't want all the money from the auction dinner. Granted I know we have to come up with money still,but I want to start an adoption grant through part of the money raised to help other local families feel empowered to not look at the bottom line but to follow the leading of God and through helping provide funding that may be more possible for more families. Anyway, for those of you who read this, please partner with me to lift high the dreams of one mommy who wants more kids and families than her own to see God move in mighty way and bring more babies and children home to their forever families. I feel like there's more here that Yakima needs an adoption ministry where we partner with families to get these kids home domestically or internationally. I just think we need to prepare for the rain, cause when we tap into what breaks God's heart, when we read all the scriptures that tell us to care for the widows and orphans, I think He is just waiting to produce greatness out of us. To help us to see the beauty that comes from investing in other people, in other children, and in other parts of our world. Down the street, or a million miles away. I feel like God is whispering "Take my hand, and I will show you the way to touch lives." I want to take His hand, don't you?

Coupon Complainer!

Ok I should probably explain, I did the whole coupon thing and it was fun and nice and all but I come home and read on Money Saving Mom.com and she all like spendin 38 for a week of groceries. So I'm complainin', ya you heard right, I know you're all surprised that I of all people would complain' but alas, here we go! So NO stores that I have found in po-dunk Yakima double coupons which I am finding is the ticket to coupon savings. So I printed a LOT of coupons and hit Walmart, and yeah I got some deals like ziploc bags, 50 count for 23 cents, and toaster strudels (which I haven't bought EVER for my kids, simply cause it's never crossed my mind) for like 1.12. So good deals but I still spent like 68 bucks, partly for baby wipes ( I didn't have a coupon), partly for mascara(searched for a coupon, not go) and well cause it's Walmart, who only spends like $20 at walmart? And if you think you are that person, you are lying, it's like Costco which I renamed "The $100 minimum store" cause I think 1 time I got out without spending $100, and that was only cause somebody pooped and I had a headache. So unless Mikey wants to 'fill the ol drawers' EVERY time I enter a Walmart or Costco it's bye bye cash. Anyway, coupons rock, love the idea, love not paying full fare, i love making it almost a game, see how little to spend, but at the end of the day..... Yakima stores SUCK, none that I have found double coupons. If any one knows of a store that doubles in Yakima, hook a lady up, yeah?
On a completely different note but praise worthy none the less, I started at my new job, which is working at the child care area in the Yakima Athletic Club. I can take my kids, (no daycare,plus, and I can be with them, plus plus) I get a free membership, and I get paid. Yup, it's that good! :). I LOVE not getting up at 5:00am and seeing my kids all day. I am also hoping to do some online writing stuff for my friends brother in law, if we can connect on when I should start, so that will be cool.
We also had parent/teacher conference this week for Faithie. I don't know how it happened but we got a teacher's pet. I know right, my kids' the teachers pet? Yeah who knew but hey she's an AWESOME student, getting 100% on reading and spelling tests, helpful even to sub's when her teacher is gone. Just all around a good kid. I am so proud to be her mama.
Hope's teacher conference was good. Well especially cause it didn't start with " You guys are only responsible for the first $10,000 of damages!" Hehe. Seriously though, she can count ridiculously high, thanks to big sis teaching her how. She knows all her stuff like colors, numbers, etc. She plays well (not bossy, I did ask for clarification of what child we were talking about, and it was Hopie). She is just an amazingly funny little girl, who happens to be super smart, and sometimes willing to share with others, I guess she's one of those at school she's like "miss helping hands" and at home she's "miss I'm hittin ya when mom turns around" and she's smilin the WHOLE time! :).
If I can get the pics up I will post their school pics. I heard this thing about advertising companies using photos from people's blogs and facebook and myspace pages without consent so I'm hesitant to throw these wonderfully cute kids on here and have someone makin moola without my consent. You could sell snow to a snow man with Hope's smile! Alright enough braggin'- if anybody knows of a doubling coupon store - HOOK ME UP!
Peace out,
Kala

Tagged

Hehe, so I think this will be fun! Ok so I got 'tagged' so I'm supposed to give fun facts ..... here we go....

1) I'm dramatic. I know hard to believe right? Ok so example, I have personally diagnosed myself as Hypoglycemic which means I have really low blood sugar and if I don't eat I get all dizzy, clammy, tired feeling, shaky, and CRANKY. So we were in Sears this morning and I was too hungry and I got all the symptoms I just listed and Jason laughed at me cause he says I'm just hungry BUT I KNOW there's more too it than that. Anyway, on the way home he was trying to have a conversation with me but I literally like shut down and can't process info so I wasn't much for talking (even though I did have plenty to say oddly enough)and he thinks I'm just dramatic. Whatever!

2) I hate bananas. I do however like banana bread. But that's it for bananas. Here's my 'logical' reason for not liking bananas. So ya know that mushy sound people make while they eat a banana, kinda like a mini smacking of the lips but more mushy sounding? Yeah well my sister used to do that crap in my face all the time and one day I had enough and decided I'm not a banana person, thank you very much. I don't like the smell, the texture, or how it sounds when someone eats them. So bananas? You can have em!

3) I don't like eggs. Nasty nasty nasty. And here's my reasoning, you know that scene in Robin Hood Prince of Thieves when the witch breaks open the egg and blood comes out? Gross, I was done after that movie. And when I was prego with Hopie I even tried to eat a quiche for good measure, eggs can be good for you. And I took one bite, almost puked and decided "Yup, done with eggs too." Makes sense right?

4) I'm really self conscious. I don't like my body AT ALL. Pre kids it was ok, post kids, does the word Nightmare ring a bell? I have a hard time liking the way I look knowing I don't do a darn thing about it, even when I do work out I don't see much of a difference so I just give up. I tell myself that if my tummy wasn't ridiculously flabby then I would feel better about myself but let's face it, I'd find something else to be upset about.

5) I have a desire to live simplistically and I live with money spender. AGH! I wouldn't mind getting rid of the Tv, goin all granola, and living simple but that's a process and will take time to implement. Although Jason totally wants to do my little personal coupon challenge and see how much money we can save.

6) I used to want to be a professional singer, so I would stand in the bathroom with my moms candle sticks (they make the best pretend microphones) and practice singing for HOURS on end. Up until a few years ago, I was trying to figure out how to get into the music business, I recorded a demo for some gal sending her song to a music company, I recorded 2 cd's of funeral music for this guy in Spokane, and got professional pics taken to send a demo into a record company.I secretly want to be on T.V. like Jon and Kate plus 8, but I would lose my mind I think, with all those people peeking in on my life, but I get lots of attention since I'm sooooo small anyway, so I'm sure I'd get used to it.

7) I'm fickle, I hate working outside the home but when I'm home too long I feel worthless. Although now that I've worked full time outside the home I appreciate the days when I can just be with my kids. I wish we made enough money I didn't have to work and could simply volunteer my time instead of always squeaking by trying to make ends meet, only focused on my little area of influence instead of going outside my world to impact others. My heart's desire is to be the person that when they see a need they meet it, no matter what. But I feel like I'm just trying to keep my head above water (financially) I can't give the time to others - I don't take the time to see it. That's something I'm really working on.

Ok, well that's random, and quite the scope of my little life.
Let's see how I can tag!

Kala

Warm Fuzzies

Ok so I'm still recovering from the flu, holy cow, it seriously kicked my tail this year, wow, anyway, Saturday come heck or high water we were heading to North Bend. And what did I find? Oh yeah baby, .99 sale racks at The Children's Place Outlet, and Carters had 1.99 with an additional 20% off. The most I paid for an item of clothing was 3.19. hehehe, warm fuzzies. I just love a good actually in this case GREAT deal. It was worth the gas to get there cause I talked my dad into driving so I didn't even pay for gas, can it get much better? Uh NO! Anyway, Jason went to an event called Super 7 which is a sleep deprived 7 hours from 11pm-6am where they play sports or swim, and to all of that I give a loud "NO THANK YOU." My sleep and I have a delicate relationship that can't be compromised by ridiculous events like Super 7. Leave it to those dumb I mean PAID youth pastors to do that stuff.
We haven't gotten to wrap up our adoption home study cause I think our social worker is sick, and man I sure hope we didn't give it to her. If that's the case she better buckle up for a nasty few days. Man, it's been 6 days since the pukes and I still can't eat without a gut ache, lousy lousy lousy! I do need to take a moment to brag though, the last few night Jason and I have been having Guitar Hero showdowns and oh yeah I am seriously kickin his tail, never mind the fact that he is playing on hard and I'm on medium at the end of the song I have a higher score so another warm fuzzy for me. Woohoo!!
I gotta go to work tomorrow and I'm dreading it, I haven't been in for 8 days due to sickness and scheduled days off so tomorrow kicks off 3 days one day off and then 2 more days. AGH. I'm dreading not being here to get Faithie ready and hang with the kids, so that's a bummer.
Ooo, oooo, one more warm fuzzy, we found out we have like 900 bucks left in our flexible spending account used for medical related expenses and we have 2 weeks to use it or it just literally floats away. So I went to Costco and picked out a new pair of glasses that are ultra hot AND a pair of some seriously rockin prescription sunglasses. Oh man I am stoked- both pairs are just rad, which is so 80's but the only word to describe the coolness level.
Well I better scoot, Mikey is dragging around a kite he found, Hope and him are aimlessly wandering the house looking for trouble I'm sure.
But before I part, I was watching Oprah and I record them and watch them later like during nap time and the other day she had this gal on who is like the Ultimate Coupon Shopper. Now here's confession time, I don't use coupons, I use card discounts like Safeway and Albertson's but nothing extra like cutting coupons. Now I now some of you are like " What are coupons?" And others may be thinking I'm some sort of weirdo who pays full fare for things. And honestly I'm somewhere in the middle of those two - I like deals but let's face it I'm too lazy to use coupons. So I decided to challenge myself to shop as smart as I can for the next month and keep track of savings to see how much we can really save using coupons. If any of you are in the coupon lane who know good coupon resources or have an extra paper I can cut coupons out of give me a holler and I'll stop by.
Ok now seriously I'm hearing " I see London I see underpants" This can't be good.
Peace out,
Kala

It hit

The horrible flu my family endured finally hit me Wed afternoon. It started with the stomach cramps and trips to the bathroom if you know what I mean. I honestly just wanted to puke already thinking everyone else only threw up like 2 times this should be over quickly. Um... so finally started puking around 9pm, didn't stop til 3:30 am, have continued frequent trips to the bathroom all day long, and am now on the achy I don't want to move, gosh I hate being sick, completely unprodcutive phase. So I'm miserable and missing Bunco which I'm totally bummed about, the one time I month I get to hang with girlfriends and I'm stuck on the couch wishing this crap will end soon. Mikey however has been taking 3.5hr naps with me the last 2 days which is heavenly, no joke. And I had to call in sick for tomorrow cause I'm done puking but 12hrs of running around and trying to keep going while I am still achy I'm sure, well that just sounds like tons of fun eh? Uh yeah not so much. So me and my hopefuly shrinking butt due to sickness is just layin low. Well it's a short post today bummer eh? I think if Sat we're all healthy we're goin to North Bend to hit a few sales at the outlet mall and call it a day. Jason is gone to Idaho for a youth all nighter, not my cuppa tea , me and no sleep, yeah we don't mix well. So I hope everyone else steers clear of the sickness!
Blessings.
Kala

Home Study Part 1

Whew! We made it through the first part. Our social worker came by today for a few hours and did the first half of our home study. I heard how nerve wracking some people feel about it and to be honest I had no preconceived notions of what it would be. What I did know is I didn't want it to look like we live like pigs OR that we tried too hard to make our house look perfect. But I will say we maintained the cleanliness everyday after it got cleaned for real, and I'm happy to say that since our social worker is coming back next Monday we have to keep it this clean. It's a good habit to start. I'm not the organized one around here so I tend to stuff things in places instead of creating a good spot for them. So we've been doin some good ol deep cleanin and it's really nice to have a place for everything and everything in it's place. So she asked us about our lives and families growing up, how we love each other, qualities about one another. How we solve problems, easy right, I'm always right! Hehe. That's how we solve them, Jason concedes. No I'm kidding but that doesn't sound like a bad plan. It was fun talking about each other with the other one there and hearing what he thinks about me and what I think about him. It was interesting how our social worker talked about what it will be like when we bring our guy home, she told us it's like our family is in a row boat and we all know our places and what our role is and then someone swims up to the boat so we pull them in to safety and in that jostling around and movement the order gets upset and everyone has to find their new spot. That really resonated with me, I liked the word picture. We will all have our adjusting to do with this, and I don't want to be naive about any of it, it won't do us any good. I also read about one gal who had older kids and everyone kept coming to see the new one and the others felt like, "What the heck, we've been here all along and they didn't stop by then." So that made me realize too that we will have to be VERY intentional with each child in making them feel their importance and worth in all of this. I've also got to get our book of our family pics sent off to our guy so he can see that holy crap we're all white! I wonder what it will be like for him to come home and all of his family doesn't look like him? That will be weird I'm sure I just want him to know how much we love him and it doesn't bother us one bit he doesn't look like us he's still our son. Oh I can' wait to meet this kid!
Anyway ,so we wrapped up with her coming back next week and I ran a few errands, and we mooched dinner off of my in laws. The night ended quickly when Faithie started puking, which was so fun, I hate it when my kids get sick. Oh yeah and Jason woke me up in the middle of the night throwing up, but he had one big incident and was done, he slept in and was doing pretty well by the time our social worker arrived. So I'm waiting for it to hit me, and Hopie. We're the last two standing so far, we'll see who holds out the longest. To be honest I would've figured it would be me since Michael sleeps with us still, I know I know, and he pretty much sleeps on me or touching me at all times. So I would've pegged me to be the first one down. Huh, we'll see. I still gotta get pics loaded for the brace. I'm slow I know. I'm actually tryin to get goin on my little business opp and want to find a stinkin name already so I can market it! We'll see. Oh and I'm applying for a side job where I can take the kids with me and hopefully between the two keep up the saving money, but be with the kids,and get my business going so I only have to do that. I can't tell you how good it feels to tell Jason I feel like I'm drowning thinking about going to work for 12 hours and missing my kids so bad. He hates me being gone too so he's being very flexible to find a way to get me out of work all together but until then find ways to keep me with the kids. When I told Faithie that I was looking for a job that would help me be home more she got a huge smile on her sweet face and gave me a hug and said "Oh good so now you'll be here!" So yeah job, what job, I gotta get home!
Thanks for listening, reading whatever, peace and have a great day!
Kala

Broken

So I'd like to make this a post about my spiritual journey and being broken before God but today, the news is... drum roll..... Hopie broke her collar bone last night thanks to our beefy dog who just needed to attack the fence to bark yet again at our neighbors slightly obnoxious dogs. So I'm doing laundry, tryin my hardest to be domestic and Hope starts screaming and crying. Faith comes running into say Nala jumped over her but she fell and she's crying (Captain Obvious!). So I got her on the couch and at this point Mikey and Hopie are bawling, Hope's hurt and Mikey's crying cause she's crying so fun stuff to say the least. So I got Hope calmed down and situated and she fell asleep while I was playing with her hair. She woke up about 20 minutes later, screaming and saying her arm still really hurt. So I called Jason home and had him diagnose that Yup she needed a trip to the doc which at 5:30 translates to the E.R. More Fun Stuff. So they headed out and I stayed with Mikey and Faith, we called the grandparents and my mom decides she's goin to give moral support and bring a sucker. So a couple hours later my baby girl comes home with a brace (pics will follow, when I find the camera) and a sucker in hand, Thank You Grandma Darla. Well Mikey got a sucker to, cause he's all about equality these days, if anybody's got something - he better be gettin some too, or buckle up. Anyway, so fun night and then to my wonder I discovered this thing called a Housekeeper. Now let me preface this with, my mother in law has this gal who cleans her house so for our anniversary that was oh I don't know 3 months ago, she gave us a house cleaning on her. So I finally cashed it in today since we've got our social worker coming Monday to do our home visits, which we don't live like pigs ( usually) but with 3 kids this house ain't as clean as she should be ok? Anybody feelin what I'm saying? So I'm lovin the clean house, although trying to find ways to keep us out of it so we have a fighting chance of keeping it clean for more than 5 minutes. Oh and Jason cleaned out our van, we're like living like clean people. It's weird, an adjustment to say the least but possibly one worth making permanent? Hmm. We'll see. It's been an eventful week, a trip to Leavenworth, a few nights of laughing hysterically with old friends, sleeping in, delicious fudge, and coming home early to a puking baby, broken collar bone, clean house, and now off to mooch dinner from Grandma Darla and Papa Steve, we're doing pizza which is always a hit in my book, Jason got his order in for the Papa Murphy's Taco Pizza, it's good ok, not worthy of eating all of it in one sitting although he will if left alone, but it's good. So we're off to top off this week with some pizza, probably ice cream and watching the kids mess up Gram's house not mine. Can it get much better? I submit it cannot! Hehe.
Peace Out,
Kala

Friends

So I gotta give a shout out to a few people who in the last week or so jump out to me as being huge prayer support and mommy support. I've got a few on the brain right now but I'll mention one - drum roll please... Nichole! Oh how I love her. She bounced into my life a few months ago, well almost a year I guess and we didn't "hit it off" cause we didn't really spend a lot of time together for a while but since we have a small church home group in our home we have become closer, and my oh my am I better for it. I've had her weigh in on a few things and isn't' it funny how usually we know the answer to the problem but it takes someone else saying it for us to register it like it was a good idea? Funny, I'm so that way, I'd like to think I am on my game all the time but let's face it that's just not me especially lately. I'm strugglin and I mean in a gut wrenching kinda way about having to work full time outside the house. My goal was to only be gone til our guy gets home but as it looks now serious medication will need to get me through. So I feel in my gut I gotta quit right, but uh that doesn't exactly make sense right now? In the middle of a costly adoption, I got this job so fast when I thought I wasn't going to be working for a while so that was a blessing for sure, but I completely and totally lost the reality of what being gone all the time is like and how stinkin hard it is. I've fought like mad comin up with odds and end jobs to be at home and now I'm gone 36+ hours a week sometimes 48 depending on overtime situation, and it's a crappy job and I do mean that literally, I clean crap. Gross eh? Yup, that's the blunt way to put it and not that the job isn't necessary - somebody's got to do it, but just not this somebody. So I have a had a few talks with friends this week and the same message is - find peace and be home with your kids. Which I know in my heart right but explain that to the hubby - hey I'm gonna cut the 1,000 + a month cool? Yeah and I don't know how to help us raise money for the adoption but it's all good right? Anyway, so back to my shout out - I love Nichole, I need her to say what she said and it wasn't revolutionary but it was needed and publicly to all 5 of you who read this blog I just want to say - I love ya Nichole, you are one amazing mommy and you hold a special place in my heart. :).
So yup that's it for now. So I am going to try a little mini business thing if it pans out I'll share it but it's in dream phase almost reality phase so we'll see. Jas is all for it which is great, I know he wants me here with the kids he did tell me the other day " I just want you to pick what you want to do and do it, I don't care what it is, just stop jumping around jobs" So I know he's game but I gotta trust that my Jesus cares that I want to be with my kids and He will show me how to do it and how to tackle our adoption moola situation. So anyone who wants to join me in prayin BIG things for this family of 5 getting their boy home to make 6, let's see what we've got in store.
Kala

Excited!!

Well all you following this perilous (ok maybe not that bad) journey we are pumped. We have our social worker meeting on Oct 6th to get our home visits done and then as soon as she is able to compile our approved homestudy we are ready to send off our paperwork to our agency. Then it goes to D.C. to be authenticated, then back to our agency to be sent to Ethiopia. Once in country it will be translated, paired with our little man's file, and then awaits court approval. Once court happens we are told our travel dates and then ladies and gentleman, we are outta here on a ungodly long flight to meet our guy. The idea of flying for like 30 hours sounds horrific BUT the idea of wrapping my arms around that little guy gives me butterflies in my tummy and makes me want to scream with delight. What a process. Ok so I just typed "horrific" and it made me think of Faithie. So the other day I was explaining to Grammy Joann that Faithie is quite good at braids these days and she pipes up " Well only on other people, on me it's just horrible!" And I laughed, what a grownup thing for a 6 year old to say. Hehe. She's a doll. I've also got to get some video on here of Mikey screaming "Mooom!" Way too cute. We also have some praises on the financial front for the adoption. We have a donor giving like $5000 which is amazing. 2 in the states tickets given so we only have to pay from New York or somewhere on the East Coast to Ethiopia and then back plus our guy. And some other people have given money totalling around $1000. So that's like awesome. We are going to apply for grants and see what comes of it. Like everyone applies and not very many get it. So we'll see. The worst that can happen is we don't get it, and that's ok. Well I'm a dope and took advil for a killer headache this morning and then ate something. Shoulda reversed that. Eat and then pills. Cause my oh my do I feel like crap! Bummer eh? Oh well, Hope is excited to lay with me on the couch and Mikey is just running around laughing so whatever! :).
Thanks for tuning into yet another ADD moment -
Blessings,
Kala

The Picnic

Ok so we pulled Faithie out of school yesterday to head to AGCI's picnic in Battle Ground WA to meet Almaz the director of Hannah's Hope in Ethiopia. So any of you ever have a plan of how things are to go and then FREAK out when it doesn't work out like you wanted? So... here's our day. I rock first of all, I packed the whole car by myself, filled up the tank, got all the clothes including jammies for all of us but Jason cause well let's face it he's a grown man he can get his own stinkin clothes, went to lunch with a friend I hold quite close to my heart, got my dad's GPS system, and was ready to head out the driveway when Jason got home with Faith. So we get on the road after a Starbucks stop ( obviously) and off we went to meet Almaz. My mind was racing with all sorts of things, what will she say about our little man? What will other people be like? Will older kids from Ethiopia be there to play with the girls? And so on and so forth. So we are doing great, one potty stop at Goldendale and we keep on truckin'. The bridge at Biggs was closed so we went to the Dalles and over the Columbia. THEN we hit a traffic delay, so for an hour and a half we moved approxiametly 4 miles! GRRR. The kids did surprisingly well except for Mikey losin it, so I let them run around the van while I impatiently waited for traffic to move. We could see smoke in the distance and speculated the entire time (and still are actually) about what was going on to cause this kind of delay. So we waited and waited some more, all this time I've planned to be in Battle Ground by 5:45 and be able to eat, play, talk, and relax. So now it's 5:45 and we start to finally move. I was a mess. I wanted to cry but I didn't thank you very much. So we made it and I held it (potty) the whole way to the picnic which if you know me personally that is a major feat in itself! So we get there at 7:10 and the picnic was scheduled to be over at 7. I was determined to meet this lady if it was the last thing I did. So we piled out of the van, the kids took off for the toys, and I anxiously waited to meet this slender, petite, pretty Ethiopian woman who would give me word on my boy. As we walked up to the picnic I almost cried. There were babies EVERYWHERE, no big kids, but babies galore. And it hit me, we are apart of this. This is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. All these drop dead gorgeous babies in the arms of their forever parents. It tears me up thinking about it now. So we met Almaz who told us our guy has a big head - literally - (he'll fit in great, I think Faith just grew into hers!) and he's amazing at soccer. He can kick the ball up from his feet, head butt it and pass it off to other players. I guess according to the parents who just traveled within the last month, he's just an amazing kid. So the wait, drive, and determination paid off BIG TIME! I'm on cloud 9 and can't wait to get this kid home!! Oh then we took the kids to Chuck E Cheese (it's) as Faith calls it to play and run off the energy. Then drove home, got in at 1am got up at 5 am for work, worked 12 hours and am now about ready to pass out! One more 12 and then 4 days off! Woohoo. Anyway, for those of you who are praying and are as excited as we are to get this boy home - buckle up cause I guess he's somethin else! :).
Blessings,
Kala

Peace Be Still

Ok, so I've pretty much been a basket case the last few days - I talked with our agency who does the home study and because we flip flopped our process and aren't done with our home study we are looking at another 2 to 3 months before our home study is done and THEN we can send our paperwork to Ethiopia! So my son is sitting in an orphanage for a couple more months than we thought cause I had no idea that until all our paperwork was in would they even open our file. So thanks to a freakin busy summer I haven't been able to get some of it done which had I known our home visit and everything else was hinging on paperwork completion then I would've tried to bust it out a lot faster although I'm not sure when that would've happened. But since we've been sending them stuff periodically I assumed they were just going to call and say they were coming over not hey by the way when you send us your mountain of paperwork THEN we'll start the home visit process. GRR, so I've been pretty upset, and feeling way too overwhelmed today with hold ups at the bank trying to get a statement of our good standing and they won't do it - and my poor sister is goin through a divorce which I can't get into here - but it's bad ok let's just leave it at that. So I've been up and mad so I opened up my Bible needing a fresh word and looked at the reading for today August 22 and it was Luke 18 1-14. Let me preface this with I need to get my boy home like more than I need to eat (ok almost but like that's the urgency I feel for him). So it starts out "Then Jesus told his disciples a parable to show them that they should always pray and not give up. He said "In a certain town there was a judge who neither feared God nor cared about men. And there was a widow in that town who kept coming to him with the plea ,'Grant me justice against my adversary.' For some time he refused. But finally he said to himself ' Even though I don't fear God or care about men, yet because this widow keeps bothering me, I will see that she gets justice, so that she won't eventually wear me out with her coming!" And the Lord said "Listen to what the unjust judge says. And will not God bring about justice for his chosen ones, who cry out to him day and night? Will he keep putting them off? I tell you, he will see that they get justice, and QUICKLY (emphasis mine). However, when the Song of Man comes, will he find faith on earth?" And it keeps going to talk about those who pray and humble themselves are justified while those who boast are not. Anyway, I needed to know that my pleading will pay off and my uneasy spirit can drive me to work like a dog to get this boy home. I'm praying for a miracle - maybe it's peace while we wait for the process or maybe it's getting him home in record time because we are able to get this all done quickly. Unite with me and plead with God to grant me my request, be Big be Fast and be I AM in all we do especially getting our little boy home. On a happy note - we had dinner with friends last night and as we left they gave us $250!! I almost cried on the way home - not only are they financially helping us but they are looking into adoption also. I couldn't be more overjoyed to open eyes and hearts the the world of orphans. Peace and Blessings for all.
Kala

My cake and eat it too!

So why can't I have this, I'm just wondering. So since I last checked in and the yard sale ROCKED I've been running like I've lost my mind finishing adoption paperwork, working full time, trying to do youth group stuff like 30 famine which by the way was HARD and I cheated - I thought I was gonna puke after 26 hrs of fasting so I ate some bread. Yeah I know I suck but hey that's me in a nut shell. And also, I'm like not one of those people who does well on low blood sugar or tired and if you mix both well good luck to you. We may not be friends when it's all said and done, too bad eh? I don't do things gracefully I decided. I can't speak gracefully, I use words like crap, frigin, and sweet. I'm loud, probably obnoxious to most, and have a hard time keeping boundaries which translates into a very busy life. So my job is all fine and dandy but 12 hour days are kickin my tail that's for sure. I'm all freakin out cause when we travel to get *H* from Ethiopia I want time to adjust for his sake and ours. This is like a monster huge transition which even after we do all our adoption courses and read like 10 more books we won't be ready for it. Jason and I are rose colored glass kinda people. Anyway, I'm trying to figure out how exactly to make some money since we'll have a nice loan payment plus be at home as much as possible - so I want my cake and eat it to! I really don't think it's too much to ask for right? Hehe. Yeah ok, see the rose colored glasses? :). Anyway, I'm looking for ways to make cash at home so we'll see! :). I'm so glad I have a blog to vent on! If any of you feel like praying for us - we need a few adoption grants to come through, donations to be awesome, *H* home soon, like I'm praying for before Christmas, and umm... maybe a nap in there! :). Peace love and cake for all!
Kala

He did it again!

God is SOOOO good. He is coming through in new ways each day, confirming our adoption and proving faithful in helping us see the light financially in this whole ordeal. Let's clear up a thing or two about adoption, best decision we've ever made and most people assume it's either free or cheap - so um.. to all of you who like me until I researched it knew NOTHING about adoption it's VERY expensive. Whether it's domestic or international (the latter is MUCH more spendy by the way) it's all got cost to it. So when we stepped out in faith to choose to adopt and got lucky enough to find our son like 6-8 months earlier than expected we lifted hands,hearts,and eyes to heaven and asked for money. Cause who doesn't right? Seriously though, we're lucky enough to have some of it through a loan which will be paid off in different ways but ultimately I got a full time job to cover payments and save money and we are just searching out how to find the dough.
Anyway, so we did an adoption yard sale fundraiser and my prayer was just don't let this be a waste of time. And MAN did friends and family come through. We had so much crap - I mean treasures - I mean stuff and we made around $1500. AHHH can you believe it? I'm just amazed and honored to be apart of all of this. God is good.
Oh then we get a call this morning and one of our local news stations heard about our story and the yard sale and they did a story on us that will air tonight at 6pm. My prayer and desire is we will be a catalyst for others to look into adoption - we're not meant to save the world alone but if we partner together we can put a dent in poverty, orphans without hope, and bring tangible relief and help to those who need it. You know the single mom down the road - watch her kids for free, mow her lawn drop off a gift card and don't let her know it came from you. Or the elderly couple - bring them their mail, pull their weeds, and walk them to their car. Anyway,I'll get off my soap box!!
Peace, Blessings and Pass the Olive Garden (that's where we're eating tonight - bring on the one million calorie Fettuccine Alfredo that's already calling my name)
Kala

Revision

Ok, this may be a mute point but I wanted to clarify an earlier statement in the post before this one. I don't believe God took our child from us in January, but I do believe he allowed it to happen so we could be open to bringing our son in Ethiopia home. Does that make sense? Some people probably wouldn't care how I worded that BUT I wanted to be clear I firmly believe that sometimes things just happen because that's the world we live in and God works through the muck and mire to bring glory to His holy name in the midst of pain and sadness as well as joy and hope. Ok, I had to get that off my chest, thanks for tuning in again! And WOOHOO again for us.. please pray with us as we talk to our agency this week to find out the process to get our boy home. Oh man, we've got another one!! Yeah for us!!

WHEWW!

Wow what a week!! We just got back from Jr Hi camp where I lead worship. What a blast! The band was amazing and we just had an awesome time leading kids to the throne of God. What an experience. I'm not well versed in leading so it was rough at first but still awesome!!! I'm beat and have LOADS of laundry but hey that's life eh??
The MOST exciting thing of all is --- duh duh duh duh... we have our little boy waiting for us in Ethiopia - AHHHH! I opened up my email and saw we had an update from our agency on waiting children. So I scroll down and see his face and I just knew. So then Jason walked in and asked "Who is that?" and I told him that he was available and he just stared at him and told me to send them an email that we want him. So we contacted our agency and no one else had sent in for information on him so we did our talk with the international pediatrician last night at camp and when we sign and send in our official referral contract HE'S OURS!!! AHHH! Amazing, I can't believe it. He's a show stopper I'm warnin ya, and the girls are super excited. Cute story time - so the other night we were praying before bed and it was Faith's turn so she said her normals thanks for everything and ends with " and Jesus please tell (I don't know if I can say his name online yet) so he'll be BOY for now, in his heart that we are coming for him." It melted my heart what a sweet way to ask God to whisper his family is coming. It must be weird for him when he doesn't know we are planning and praying and freaking out excited that he's coming - he doesn't know we exist yet. Oh but he will!!! His days are coming of Hopie tickling him and then bossing him around, Faithie helping him brush his teeth and Mikey taking his toys. Oh the joy! :). My heart is quite full tonight thinking about how amazing my God is. I went to the Casting Crowns concert and they sang their song " Love her like Jesus" and I lost it. That song hasn't meant much to me until I heard it with the ears of one mommy giving up her baby so another mommy can love and raise him. And my heart breaks now as I think about how she holds him in her thoughts and heart and how she wants to hold his face in her hands. I promise I will do my best to love him like he deserves offering him compassion, love, and a safe place to fall. I cherish her decision to let us be apart of his life and thank my God that took one life from me and gave me another in return. "You give and take away, but blessed be Your name!"
Well not much else going on than being on cloud 9 for the last week. We also just fast forwarded our process by about uh 6 months and uh we don't have all the money yet, so uh hey God remember us!! I am banking on a miracle. Let us pray!! :).

My Jesus, My Saviour
Lord there is none like You
All of my days
I want to praise the wonders of Your mighty love!


Blessings,
Kala

Thankful

So how cool is my God - uh this cool.... So I got hired at a Retirement facility in their nursing home as a Dining Room lead where I will be helping set up meals, feeding residents who need assistance and charting who ate what - etc. Anyway I got hired about 4-6 weeks sooner than I was expected to. Jason had just told me he forgot to put a tithe check in 2 weeks previous and it was just sitting there waiting to be given to the church so he quickly thought about just tearing it up and using it for bills cause with me not working it's been 'tight'. So he then caught himself and just remembered faithfulness it better than money in the bank. Three days later I got a call saying they could hire me RIGHT away and to start this week. So I will be working 3 12hr days in a row on a rotating schedule - I'm SOOOO excited. This means we can save a good chunk of money every month for the adoption and we won't be tight either!! Anyway, we also announced to friends if they want to donate to our adoption yard sale fundraiser they could and my carport is FULL of stuff people have dropped off. I'm just feeling good and blessed right now. I also got invited to a Casting Crowns concert on Sat night in Spokane and then I'm off to lead worship for a week at a jr high youth camp(which I'm pretty nervous about) but it will be nice to go to a worship concert the night before and get all in the mood. I just wanted to give a shout out to Nichole (you know who you are) for asking me to the concert and being a good friend - I look forward to a fun drive and getting to know you better!!! I already enjoy our friendship- this will be great!
Peace out - I gotta go sign new hire paperwork in an hr and my hair isn't curled!
Kala

Dreams

So I was thinking again ( I know scary scary) about adoption which got me thinking about dreams. (Man I hope this makes sense, in my head it does but outside of Kala Land let's see if it works.) So we all have dreams don't we? When we're little dreams of being doctors, going to the moon, eating large amounts of cookies, kissing the cutest boy in class, staying up late with girlfriends, our weddings, how many kids we'll have (in the 4th grade I was quoted in our yearbook saying I would be a mommy and have 10 kids, 3 down 7 to go, Lord help me!), who we will marry and how much fun we'll have as adults. And when we get married we dream of our lives with our spouse, how many kids, buying a house, the dog, white fence - all that good stuff. Then...we see our babies - and if you get to carry your own that moment you see the pink lines you dream of their hair color, boy or girl, their eyes, smile, laugh, maybe even of leaving them in a store, but we dream don't we? I remember what it felt like to see each of my babies for the first time - I'm tearing up thinking about it - that moment where they cry - you give a sigh of relief and then hold them like they're glass - ah that is a moment dreams are made of. Ok so take a break from that. I get an email from our agency about children who have recently been abandoned with our agency in Ethiopia and my heart breaks realizing the reality of these children - what are their dreams but even deeper - what are their mothers dreams? What kinda world do we live in where some mommies don't get to see their babies grow up because there isn't enough food- what about those mommies dreams? So as I was folding laundry which I loathe by the way I got to thinking - God's dream for us is to connect with each other in such a way that everyone is helping everyone. That none of us lack, that we are all loved,fed, warm, and cared for. And adoption is a practical way to love someone you haven't even met. To honor the dream of a mother you probably won't ever met but will forever have a connection to because you are raising her child. Oh her dreams must soar for her babies - someone to always give them food when they need it, hug and kiss them, rock them to sleep, help them go to school and be the best person they can be. So that's what I think about when I'm folding laundry. Hehe, deep huh? Yeah that's me, I'm deep ( yeah I wish) but really I honestly feel like not only did God call us to adopt and give me a dream of a child I don't have a face or name of but he also held a mothers hand and heart as she decided the best shot for her kid was if someone else raised them. Oh how God's heart must break, he holds orphans so close to his heart, how can we not be apart of something so tender? Anyway, well now that my mind is clear, off to put laundry away - woohoo.

Bummer

So ever had one of those days where everything you touch gets destroyed? Yeah that was my day today! GRRRR!! It's been a while (Thank God) since I've had such a bad day that everyone heard about it AND the poor kidlets suffered. Jesus pretty much held my hand over the last year on learning how to be frustrated but not yell at the kids and to try and be calm when explaining what needs to happen or fixing a situation. And today I regressed a WHOLE year. Crap, square one again. I just got up EARLY like 4:40 for work, and was doing ok til about 7:30 and then everything I touched was wrong, I made dumb mistakes with people's drinks, forgot to do other stuff and just wanted to sit down and cry. So then got off work had lunch at the park which was nice, got home tried to take a nap since I was up at an ungodly hour and the kids wouldn't be quiet. So I found myself screaming (quiet eh?) SHUT UP and then my attitude regressed from that point on. I just don't like being like that. It's like some B horror movie where you watch it and think "This sucks lets find something better to do - like anything but this" BUT as much as you want to leave you just sit there and endure it and when it's all done look back ant think "Well I'm now dumber for watching that". I did wake up refreshed this morning though and having a late start - and skipping church - I gotta take my freebees when I get them. Jason is at camp all week and he left at O-dark-thirty today so we're having a lazy day. I need those sometimes. Anyway, we've got our home group meeting tonight and my house is surprisingly clean so we're gonna get outta here so it stays that way til group. Home group is one of my most favorite parts of the week - I love the people that come and we always talk about good stuff AND it's the one time each week Jason and I unite to clean. A beautiful thing let me tell ya. Funny thing at my house, my husband is a much better cleaner and organizer than I am BUT he leaves it in my hands so we end up with closets that shouldn't be opened quickly, drawers stuffed that you now can't open at all and funny little places that in 2 weeks I will find stuff and think "Oh that's where I put that!" Yeah I'm one of THOSE people. Wish I wasn't but lo and behold I am. Well my kids need a GOOD scrubbin, Michael seems to know something about dirt I don't it tastes good. That kid is constantly flinging dirt, eating dirt, rolling in dirt and he's now figured out how to get his diaper off so now he's naked in dirt! Gotta run! :).
To all of you who read this - I LOVE YA
Kala

FYI

Ok all you out there who haven't read "The Shack" get on it!! It will rock your socks like crazy and then after more of you read it we can dialogue about it. Seriously chapter 3 will make you want to not finish cause it's got some tough stuff in it. BUT you will also breeze through it and find you read it in like a day or two every spare minute you will want to finish this book. It's that good. This book pretty much revolutionalized my thinking and at the end I gave a good sigh thinking " Oh man that's who I need and want my God to be!" Pick up a copy if you live by me I've got one - but trust me you will want your own to pass out! Ok, so read up little students and we will chat it up when some of you finish. Who up for the challenge?

WOOHOO!!!

Done done done done done, I'm soooo done with class!! Oh man, now I get to hang with the kiddos finally. It was an interesting and exhausting experience. I met a wonderful lady named Geneva Jo who in about 10 minutes impacted my life. I painted her nails on a Friday and she was on hospice care Monday afternoon. She went to walk with her Jesus on Tuesday around 11:30 am. I held back tears but was glad before she passed I wrote her a note and her daughter read to her something along the lines of "sometimes God brings people into our lives and the minute you meet them you know you are a better person for having them there, and Geneva Jo, you made me better by knowing you." ah, what a wonderful lady, she lead a good strong life and I sat in our lunch room and looked up on the board to read "Behold I make all things new" Revelation 21:11 (?) and my heart skipped a beat - she's been made new!!Hallelujah, praise Jesus she is at peace and breathing easy! :). I've also had the chance to pick the brain of an almost 101 year old lady who is delightful. I was told I'm cuter than a button and have nice breasts (by a lady) so I told Jason - Hi Five you and a 70yr old lady like my boobs! :). I've also seen true love at it's finest and want to be loved forever like this one couple. She touches and kisses his hand so gently and he whispers he loves her and I'm tearing up thinking about it. Who would've thought love looked so lovely in two old wrinkly hands and wheelchairs? Huh, I learned more than I thought I would and will probably work there for a bit to get my feet wet - then onto the hospital. I did apply but lo and behold on the med term test I found out there were names to parts of our body I didn't know existed....So.... long story short I need to score higher on med term before I reapply!! Maybe that's a good thing, it wouldn't look good to hear your aide holler down the hall...."You put that where?? That's in the body?? I thought that was a type of shoe or underwear or whatever" So yeah I'll learn me up some med terms and give em .. heck .. at the hosptial.
As far as the adoption goes we are trying to plug away, lots of paperwork and notarizing ahead!! I just am glad for reassurance that we're on the right path and that when I lose focus on the reality of meeting my child that could very well be alive right now and I don't know their face or name but they are apart of me just gets the blood a pumpin and I wanna fly over to Ethiopia RIGHT now and pick them up and tell them my heart heard their cries and Im here to love them. So anyway, I'm such a sap. :). I tear up just thinking about my kids (the ones I've met and the ones I haven't).
Anybody heard the new Natalie Grant song "I will not be moved?" Uh somebody peeked in on this little life and made a song of it. I wonder if I can get royalties?! If you haven't heard it a little slice is the chorus :
I will stumble
I will fall down
But I will not be moved
I will make mistakes
I will face heartache
But I will not be moved
On Christ the solid rock I stand
All other ground is sinking sand
I will not be moved

Huh, words to live by eh?? Time to sleep (dream on right?)
Blessings,
Kala

Checkin in....

Holy cow, I'm busier than a one armed paper hanger these days!! AGH!! High Five to any single mom that manages to have her kids in clean clothes, a job, and spend time with her kids. I'm not even a single parent, I've got a super involved hubby and I'm losin my ever lovin mind!! I just can't imagine doing this on my own. Well school's goin good, I've got a 98% in my class and we start clinicals in a few days, which is SWEET cause I finally get to wear my SUPER cute scrubs! :). Hehe. I'm studyin my brains out for a medical terminology test at Memorial so I can get on hopefully as a Unit Secretary til my NAC is all done and taken care of. I'm prayin I don't have to work in a nursing home, I just don't feel called there but I'll pay my dues if I have to. Oh Lord please don't make me pay my dues there! :).
So we took the new 7th graders to the river this last Friday and other than being a buffet for mosquitos which in the famous words of Faithie "WHY did God have to create mosquitos?" Which is a valid question and one I'd love answered...huh good luck eh? Anyway, we've got an awesome group of 7th graders, I'm just so excited at this new batch of kids. We're lookin at good times ahead. Well I gotta learn some med terms and study for a 2 chapter test tomorrow and start on 3 more chapters of homework for a test on Wed. Yup it's official I just lost my mind! Oh and did I mention we've been married 8 YEARS tomorrow, I said in church on Sunday - "It's a good thing I didn't kill Jas that first year, this worked out pretty good!" Man do I love that guy. Peace out and if I remember how to type I'll send out another post in a few days, well when I find my mind!! :).

Amazing

Ok, God is like the coolest I decided. So we have a family in our church who contacted us about helping with the adoption expenses, which feels like a total confirmation to what we are doing. We decided that whatever it costs we are good for it, and if it costs us a lot then that's ok too, well worth the chance to see God be mighty. Anyway, its' exciting and wonderful to see the pieces slowly fit together. I'm just thrilled to be apart of the plan for a child to be in a forever family, and we get to be that family, how much better can life get I mean really?
Also, I suck at Guitar Hero, I played numerous times last night at our out of school bash at youth group and it's offical : I SUCK!! I was on easy the whole time and still didn't beat a kid who has never played before. (man I wish I was lying about that!) Although I played Bobby a kid in youth group who is amazing on expert level and beat him but I was on easy so I didn't really beat him but it makes me feel better. Hehe. I'm a dork, oh well!
I also learned how to take vitals today so anyone needing their blood pressure stats, I'm available. Can't promise they will be accurate but I'll give it the good ole college try! :). We had like 20ish minutes to learn how to use a blood pressure cuff, which is fun trying to put on your own arm, pump up let out the air to get a reading while listening for a pulse to find out the reading, oh and the whole time your fingers are like numb because the first time I didn't let the air out fast enough and got all tingly. Not a good idea but I'm a beginner. I bought a cuff and stethescope to do it on Jason tonight, little does he know but he's gonna have tingly fingers too, and maybe after a few tries I'll get it right. :).
I've got homework and some blood pressure to mess with, til later.....
Kala
(oh and I got scrubs the other day - I'll post pics when I get a chance to show ya just how cute I will be in clinicals!)

Food

So I was just thinking about food and eating( a favorite pastime if you will) and decided to post my fav's:
Fav Foods (in no particular order of course)
Mac N Chz - Kraft not the fake crap OR Stouffers frozen kind (incredible)
Spaghetti (any noodles, never met a noodle I didn't like) no meat sauce
Fettucine Alfredo from Olive Garden (I think it's somewhere around uh 1 million calories but worth every bite)
Steak (well done thank you very much)
Pizza
French fries (one of the only things McD's does right)
Wendy's Spicy Chicken Sandwich - Holy cow this sucker is good.

And I'm sure there's more maybe I will remember later!

Oh this is a fun one...
Fav coffee drinks (working at Starbucks for the last 9 months has provided me with endless opportunities to make FUNKY drinks)
Iced Grande White Chocolate Caramel Macchiato with Xtra Caramel - YUM
Tall Half Vanilla, Half White Choc With Caramel Drizzle on the foam Latte
Tall 1 pump Mocha,1 pump White Choc, 1 pump Vanilla,some caramel sauce with caramel and mocha drizzle on the whip - DELICIOUS
Of course Vanilla Latte
Blended Strawberry Lemonade
Iced Grande Vanilla Starbucks Doubleshot

Tell me what your favorite drink is??


Update on the movie situation, Kung Fu Panda, (drum roll please) Very good, kids laughed out loud, worth a trip to the theatre for sure. By the way McD's sucks, the little yogurt parfait - smaller, frozen, and still a buck - I feel very ripped off. Note to self - boycott of McD's - I'm so done with you McD's!!! Muahahahaha

Cried

So... I post the blog about God's goodness and Sunday night, I think in the wake of knowing I was starting new training and everything I just got overwhelmed. I went back to January when we lost the baby and in an instant I was bawling like a baby reliving the memories of sadness and pain. I think in those moments it's ok to let go. Jason held me and I just lost it. I got pretty overwhelmed and then I felt this whisper in my heart. God sweetly saying "I'm sorry for the pain, it's gonna be ok" And I lost it again. I'm so glad for a God who comforts over and over again even over the same hurts and pains and I needed that fresh reminder that it's gonna be ok.
I'm so excited to be adopting and beginning this journey but in that moment my sadness of the baby took over. Jason is sooooo good to me, he just held me and I was very transparent with him - it was a good time to just be together!

Anyway, today is Tuesday and things are good. I just talked with our case manager from AGCI (our agency) and went through the mountain that they term a "packet" hehe, I told her they need to rethink their terminology, slightly deceiving, but very helpful none the less. We've gotta a lot to do over the next few months, fingerprinting, medical exams, etc but all worth the prize!! I think I'm gonna journal for our new child this experience - so as we have our dreams and present realities of what adoption intails they will be able to look back years later and see how much we loved them before we knew their face or name. When they were just a dream in our hearts.

Nurse Assistant Training is going really good, I like it. Not much for the idea of bed pans and fecal matter I'm not gonna lie BUT keeping my eye on the prize getting to the holy grail (personally) the labor and delivery or mommy/baby floor. AHHH!! I can't wait. I know it's not all glamorous but to be the person that helps in those beautiful and tiring hours after delivery just floats my boat.
Well Faithie graduated from kindergarten today and wants a party, she is so my kid!! (I call my parents 2 weeks before my birthday to remind them it's coming - I like attention) and we decided to go to dinner at McD's which I loathe with a passion but will tolerate for my child, go see Kung Fu Panda ( a review to follow whether ya'll wanna know or not) and ice cream at coldstone. Should be a great night. I have high hopes of gaining a few un-needed extra pounds and rolling home like a dough boy. (No pics to follow that mess! :). ) I decided my meal of choice at McD's will be a fruit parfait, fries, and a drink water maybe if I'm a good girl, we'll see can't make any promises!


Thanks for tuning into another ADD moment in print and ta ta for now!

Weekend fun!

So this weekend we went to Darin and Sabrina Millions wedding. What a day of answered prayer! Long have we waited on the Lord to send her a daddy for Campbell and for her to have a partner in life and Hallelujah it happened officially on Saturday. I wish we would've thought previous to driving an hour out of town to bring our camera to take pics but oh well that's our life now isn't it?? Always remembering after the fact! Hehe, oh well, what can I say?
The drive was beautiful and we stayed with an amazing family "The Youngs" who fed us like kings and queens and made us feel quite at home in their awesome house and took a gazillion pics of the girls.

When we got home I found our home study "packets" which must be lay terms for BINDERS FILLED WITH PAGES AND PAGES AND PAGES of documents. I've got quite the job ahead of me to read and begin the paperwork process. I'm good for it though!
Tonight our home group met and talked about prayer and watched a Nooma by Rob Bell called Open. I got pretty emotional and tried to hide it.. not sure how good I did at that but it's worth a shot eh? Through the last 5 months God and I have been on quite a journey of heartache, love, faith, freedom and trust. I just really want to publicly praise the God who gives and takes away. As we get closer to our "due date" for our baby in heaven today, my heart is sad but reassured that it's gonna be ok. I think back to the night I figuratively threw my hands in the air and cried out to my comforter how I couldn't do this anymore. The pain and guilt over the loss of my baby was too much. I remember feeling crushed under it's pressure and the instant relief he gave to my broken spirit. He is my comforter and my shelter, he did not forsake me.
The video reminded me of being in Spokane and praying with all my might for God to heal Zack, a little boy in our church who ended up dying of cancer at the age of 7. When I think back on that time I still can't believe he wasn't healed and my heart still breaks at the reality of what his parents had to endure. So this video hit my heart tonight and after watching it I'm sooooooo glad that I can look back and forward knowing I'm walking hand in hand with a God who won't let me go even when I may feel like he did.
So I go to bed tonight with a thankful heart, I think I will always think about the baby I will never hold or nurse or tuck in at night (cue my tears) and while it's not how I wanted it EVER and I don't know if I ever want to have to go through anything that painful again, my God was faithful to save me and I will praise him til the day I die for his never-ending patience and willingness to pick me up, dust me off, hold me and let me just be.
I hold tight to Jeremiah 29:11 "for I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart."
Our path after loss lead us to adoption and while I'm seeing it's not for the faint of heart FOR SURE, it's one of blessing, trial, perseverance, and love. As we journey with our Creator to expand our family I'm excited to see how this will all play out and meet the child that I carry in my spirit! Thanks for your prayers and GOOD NIGHT.
I start my training tomorrow if you think of me, PRAY, I'm nervous to be away from the kids every day all day for 5 weeks.
We also did some professional family pics today at Jeff and Joann's house (my inlaws) here's some extras: (note- these arent the professional ones )


Blessings,
Kala

Livin the dream.....

Ok so kinda, it's just another day in paradise I guess! I found out last Thursday that I got into a Nurse Assistant training program that starts June 9th, and I'm SUPER excited, it's one step closer to literally livin the dream of being a Labor and Delivery RN. I'm hoping after my training and certification that I can get on at Memorial on Labor and Delivery floor or Mommy/Baby. So that's super cool.
Today I also got an email from All God's Children saying they recieved our contracts and we are officially clients and can start our homestudy and dossier!! WOOHOO! One step closer to my new kiddo.
I have been reading like a mad woman all these adoption books and it stirs my heart to it's core to think we are on the road of our own story and as it unfolds I'm so thankful to share it!!
I will keep you posted on our homestudy process - from what I hear the contract paperwork pales in comparison to homestudy paperwork, so that sounds like fun eh? :). We are praising God day by day for allowing us to join him in a journey of faith, surrender, mercy and hope. I hope you all in internet land enjoy the journey with us and pray for guidance in how you can partner with God in what he has for you.
Toodles

Just so you know.....

Hey guys I put a link to our adoption agency on here for you guys to look over if you want. They are pretty amazing, if you want to see just how awesome they are give them a peek, oh and check out the Adoption Programs link to Welcome Home page Ethiopia to see how absolutely adorable these kids are! Oh I'm sooooo excited!! :). Toodles for now.

The whole fan-damily

Hey it just occurred to me that there's no recent pics of our fantastic 5.
Faith is 6 - AAGHHH - this can't be right? I'm not old enough to have a 6 year old right?
Hope is 4 1/2 and CRAZY, but awesome all at the same time. She will forever keep me on my toes - but if you know me you know where she gets it!!
Mikey- is 14 months old and about the cutest thing ever, he has the Johnston space in this top teeth and can pretty much fit his two bottom teeth in the gap of the top middle two. WAY TOO CUTE.
In less than a month Jason and I will have survived I mean enjoyed 8 years of marriage. It's a good thing I didn't kill him the first year (hehe), he's an amazing dad and my best friend, I thoroughly enjoy his company and constant annoying comments, what would my day be without them?? And he's gonna freak when he sees that pic of him on here! Ha!

It's been a while!!

Hello all you Johnston fans, it's been like 8 months or so since we updated our blog. Life has been fun, challenging, uh a roller coaster would be a great description. Most of you know about our surprise pregnacy in October and our horrible miscarriage on January 30,2008. I'm glad we are into late spring now, those early days of loss wore on my emotions, and I just wanted to be on the other side of grief.
Thanks be to God for his all consuming peace and patience with my broken heart that so desperately needed to be repaired. He is the ultimate healer and gave me friends who spoke peace and hope when I just couldn't see it for myself.

After a few months of working through our loss, I went through a series of emotions that could've been classified as crazy I'm sure and Jason was kind enough to play along. He's a great guy, and a saint in my book for putting up with me!! So I began to calculate when to get pregnant again, how soon, trying for a boy or girl etc etc. I just really needed something happy to think about and focus on. Then I sat down and watched Idol Gives Back and I felt this overwhelming sense of how wrong it was that there are so many people especially children who have no hope, no resource, and in the case of the children no parents. I couldn't figure out what I was feeling but I knew there's a part I can play in this and started praying about what in the world was stirring in my heart. So then I go to church and hear a missionary from Mozambique speak on the suffering of his people and the hope missions and God brought to him.
All of this was mixing together and turning into a passion that didn't have a focus until I suddenly thought "What if we adopted a child?" I am passionate about my kids who are freakin awesome I might add, but even more than that God gave me a passion for children a long long time ago. So I asked God to show me if this was a fire he gave me and if it was to make it burn til it hurt. So..... lesson here... be careful what you pray for!! :).
I suddendly began researching agencies, reading as much material as I could handle each day and praying for direction.
I was lead to All God's Children International after seeing them on an adoption story on the discovery channel. I researched them and loved what I saw. So the dream began to take shape.
Since finding our agency we have completed our application, been accepted, and yesterday we sent our contracts and a LOT of money to get started.
Throughout these beginning days of this process God has made himself so clear and has been guiding our path so directly that I just know regardless of the ups and downs it's just gonna be ok.
I think when we tune into what breaks God's heart (homeless , mother and fatherless children) we begin to see something bigger than ourselves and begin to feel him smile on our hearts cry to make this world better one person at a time.
I really don't know what to expect in this process - but I do know that I am carrying a child in my spirit that I don't know yet, I don't have a face or a name just a dream to be a mommy and honor the request of God to love the least of these.
As we go through our journey I'M going to blog to keep you all updated in internet land, I know that there are sooooooo many already wanting updates and have questions - so ask away. I don't know much more than you but want to share the dream.
My hope and prayer is that through this experience all of us will begin to see the bigger picture and hopefully more hearts will open to adoption and loving those who have no hope.
May God bless you and keep you,
Kala